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For $7,999, Be Dually Noted
For $7,999, Be Dually Noted-April 2024
2024-02-19 EST 22:10:09

In Kurosawa’s brilliant Seven Samurai, a village is saved from invaders by a septet of protectors. In case you need saving from this past weekend’s epic Nor’easter, today’s 8-tired Suzuki Samurai goes Kurosawa one better, but would its price take too much of your savings?

They say no two snowflakes are exactly alike, but that fact of nature is of less importance when there’s a bajillian of the unique little guys piled in your driveway and you’ve got a hankering for some Ben and Jerry’s.

Of course, if you had something like today’s then you’d already be half-way through your tub of Cherry Garcia because it has snow conquering 8-wheel drive. It wears them two deep, making the checking of the air pressures an all-day affair, but also ensuring that road kill, or snow, never stands a chance.

The seller claims he built this octet offensive as a bushwhacker, but that a construction project is taking up too much of his waking hours to allow him to enjoy the truck. Instead he wants to send it to someone with more time on their hands - like say, someone who can’t get to work due to all the damn snow!

This soft top Samurai is painted in”mossy oak” camo and features seats likewise upholstered in a manner appropriate for a duck blind. That, and the eight, 32-inch BFGs aren’t the truck’s only claims to fame when it comes to whimsy either, there’s a hand grenade hood ornament and a giant wind-up key on the back panel deck. Cheekily, it’s branded as an “H4” - a reference to the H1-H3 series of trucks - as though it’s Barbie’s dream Hummer. . . . or I guess that would be Ken’s dream, but whatever.

There’s also a vinyl roof to keep the weather out, although there’s no mention of whether it also comes to the camo-themed party appropriately dressed.

You might think that the Suzuki’s tiny 1.3-litre, sixty-some horse four would have enough in the balls department to spin eight tires, but don’t worry, it doesn’t know! The rolling resistance is greater, sure, but at least all the added weight is unsprung so it’s no more tippecanoe and tyler too than normal.

Even though just hit by what Bostonians like to call a wicked pissah of a storm, it’s not just the United States Northeast that’s a prime market for a truck like this Samurai.It’s a little known fact, but snow can occur almost anywhere. Oh sure, Florida is immune to it, but they have alligators and , so you’re probably better off steering clear of the wang state on general principle.

Pretty much everywhere else, you’re going to want to be prepared for the snow business, and what better way than with an eight-wheeled camo Samurai? Of course, that’s if its price isn’t a snow job. What do you think, is this OMG BFG-equipped Suzuki worth the $7,999 the seller is asking? Or, is this a Samurai whose price makes you say not-for-I?

You decide!

or go if the ad disappears.

H/T to Ramcharged for the hookup!

Help me out with NPOCP. Click to send a me a fixed-price tip, and remember to include your commenter handle.

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