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For $13,500, Malibu Barbell
For $13,500, Malibu Barbell-September 2024
2024-02-19 EST 22:10:14

The Chumash native Americans originally named the area north of Los Angeles Humaliwo, or the surf sounds loudly. Cruising PCH in today's Chevy Malibu, you just might not hear the surf over its non-native LS1.

Today, Malibu is an enclave of the well-to-do trust fund hippies, and celebrities, but that wasn't always the case. In the 1930s, Pasadena, some 30 miles inland of the Pacific was where the rich and famous vacated, as evidenced by such still existing locales as Mary Pickford's Pickfair estate. Pasadena is also noteworthy as the home of the Beach Boy's hot-rodding granny - the Little Old Lady from Pasadena.

What does all that have to do with today's ? Well, sporting both a half-landau roof, and an LS1 out of a modern day GTO you could easily imagine that Septuagenarian Pasadenian terrorizing Colorado Boulevard in this muscle-hiding Malibu.

And if not her, then maybe you?

The seller claims the 5.7 is the all alloy thingamabob, meaning it should make about 350-bhp minimum, and he says it's backed up by a T56 6-speed, in case granny like to row her own. A Ford 9" with 3:70 finals should help keep it from dumping its inion on the pavement, while a litany of new parts mean that the rest of the driveline should be equally as durable.

Not only does this sleeper come with the big Goat balls underneath, but the seller says you get the factory engine, tranny and taillights as well, in case you need a boat anchor or front yard objet d'art. Inside, there's what he says are rare vinyl seats- and I don't know about you but I think vinyl seats can stay rare, especially in summer. Still, this Malibu has ‘em, and in fact the whole cabin is covered in so much plastic it's like the guy designing it must have been named Hefty. On the plus side, it does sport the under steering column crotch cooler for all your skirt-wearing pleasure.

In the pictures the buttercup yellow paint and black half-landau (more vinyl!) are set off by faux wire wheel covers and a jaunty bit of Von Dutch defining the fender tops. This being a refugee from the seventies, there are still copious quantities of chrome and brushed metal trim to make sunglasses mandatory accessories on cloud-free days. The seller says the car also comes with 15" rally wheels and a Vette engine cap, but Granny might not care about those as much as she would trolling for ‘Stangs and collecting pinks with this sleeper. The 47,000 miles on its clock seem just about as important as the whole thing looks almost factory fresh, and most of the moving parts probably have far fewer.

It's odd that the aspirationally proportioned Barbie never actually had a Malibu car, despite calling the exclusive enclave her home for decades. No, she preferred Corvettes and New Beetles - a car that her platonic friend Ken looked smashing in, when wearing his paisley ascot. Perhaps the reason may have been that, until this car, there wasn't a Malibu that met her needs for both stealth and pavement-pounding performance. And now that Barbie is in her fifties, and potentially a grandmother, maybe this car will suit here, and perhaps she'd move to Pasadena and become. . .

If she did, affording the car wouldn't be a problem, considering how many bitchin outfits the blonde has, she could certainly be able to cough up the $13,500 that the seller of this Malibu os asking. But what about you? Do you think that by paying that much Barbie would be getting screwed, despite not being anatomically correct? Or, is that a small price to pay for a Malibu that could easily be the terror of Colorado Boulevard?

You decide!

or go if the ad disappears. H/T to west-coaster for the hookup!

Help me out with NPOCP. Click to send a me a tip, and remember to include your commenter handle.

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